I'M GIVING UP.

I'M SAD.

I'M DOWN.

I'M VERY, VERY, VERY URGH! SAD.

I did. I tried. But, it isn't turn up like how I want it to be. But, its okay. I'll be rebellious. Like seriously, I am going to be.

I know. I maybe not have the chance to go to the UK, without my parents support, parents hardship and so so so on. I KNOW that. and after all I've said, I know I can't have a break of working in MAY and JUNE. and so on, till I don't know when will I stop working? Yes. I don't know. But, again. This is where I LEARN to SACRIFICE. I am LEARNING MY ASS OFF TO THAT WORD : SACRIFICE.

I'm sad. Yes. I am. Really. I can't stop crying. Yes I do. MAY. JUNE. I am going to make you useful as I wish. Every weekend I can go out, but not overnight or staying up at friend's place. But, once in a month or so, I am going to do this. YES. I am. After working hours, I am going to meet my friends and date and hang out. I am. No matter what. I'm not scared of getting scold anymore. I try to be.

But, still.. I am planning to go for the 5 weeks english prog in August. I am.

Syafiq Sapian; he is the reason why I'm still here, go with the flow, without fail, support me through ups and downs I face in life. He is the reason why I am trying to be strong. Stronger than I thought I am.